“Go to bed.” But even the word “bed” caused her to tremble a little.I went off like a good boy. I thought about going back in a little while a...d knocking on her door, but decided against it. Instead I masturbated and imagined her doing the same, congratulating herself on her willpower and cursing herself for her lack of adventure.The convention was quite amusing and some of the other people were interesting, but Lindy and I were trapped in a cloud of longing and fantasy.At 4pm we wrapped up the. Couldn’t control my feelings: she wasn’t mine any more. She was somebody else’s, or even multiple guys’. It was wrong of me to be possessive, or jealous, or controlling, whatever it was, but I couldn’t help it, even while hating it. Perhaps if I hadn’t actually seen it ... but I had, and heard it too.She looked into my eyes and knew instantly that things had changed, and why. Heartbreak flashed across her face, then it shut down. Alice must have described me.“What happened, where did he go?” I. Damn! Why boys are so fuckin bastards. Please sue. Am sorry. Please forgive me. Im just a fucking bitch who loves you, who cares about you. I cant believe you betrayed me ! You love my body, not me. Thanks for everything. I ran into my own room and locked the door. My head was spinning, and I felt like I wanted to cry. I laid on my bed for hours, with thoughts of my brother running through my head. I could hear him moving around the house, and it made me feel bad. I knew I couldnt be near him. He was the one whose reluctant dismissal she rued to this day. It’d been eight years since she saw him, and he looked better than ever. He was as fit as ever, his face showing no indications of the worries of life. It was as if time had forgotten to leave its impression as it circled around, then beyond him. She ached for him instantly. He was right in front of her yet, hard as she tried, she could not will her own feet to move--to make the ten or twelve steps that would close the gap between.
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