"Alright, I'll buy the jumper cables, then fuck the shit out of you, then jump your car. Deal?" "Deal." I waited in his Jeep while he ran in. I took a...peak at his CD collection. Lots of Lynyrd Skynyrd and Garth Brooks. He had a camouflage steering wheel cover. Within five minutes, he returned with the cables and climbed in his Jeep with me. He threw them into the front seat and leaned in to kiss me. His beard tickled my skin as he unzipped my pink puffy coat and peeled it down my shoulders. I. I’d just graduated from high school the week before.“Why? What have I done wrong?” I asked him.“You haven’t done anything wrong,” he replied. “I’ve just decided to practice what I preach. Please understand it’s nothing personal. I’d like to see what kind of man this makes out of you.”“This is kind of sudden, Dad,” I said. “What about my college plans?”“Figure it out for yourself. Just assume that I died suddenly and left you penniless.”“What does Mom think about this?”“I think you’ll. Does your husband think about you during lovemaking? Robin.(Camera pans to Richard and Robin.)Robin: Why, of course. My Richard always thinks about me.BZZZZZZ (A buzzer sounds.)Peter: I'm sorry Robin, that is not what Richard said.Robin: What? You sick bastard, wait till we get home. You'll be thinking about your right hand from now on.Richard: Baby, it happened maybe once or twice.Robin: Maybe your hand won't mind you being a 30-second man.Richard: I'm sorry Baby, really.Robin: You're sorry. .. I dunno, they just are. Then you have thirteen different ranks, those are the little numbers on the cards. The higher the number, the more value it has. There are also Jacks, Kings, Queens, and Aces. Those are the highest ranks. Ace is the highest, then King, then Queen, then Jack.”“But the Queen should be the highest rank,” Holly protested, cocking her head at him.“If it was based on Betelgeusian hives, yeah, but it’s based on the human feudal system. There are also Jokers, but don’t worry.
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